Breaking News!

I have so many blogs that I need to write, but I felt this one needed to be posted immediately. Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are getting a divorce after only 72 days of marriage. Of course, people are saying that this was all a publicity stunt and it was all done just to get money. I watched the 2 part wedding special on E! and I don't think it was fake. The couple didn't seem to be getting along at the rehearsal dinner because Kris just didn't care about anything and was giving answers to questions to clearly piss people off so I'm thinking things just went down hill from there. I'm also thinking that the second they got engaged, E! wanted to make a TV special and the couple was kind of forced into things. Kim probably knew before the wedding that this wasn't going to work out, but for some reason did it anyway. Plus, Kris is so young! I don't know many guys who are ready for marriage at age 26, especially professional basketball players. It didn't really add up in my opinion. Either way, the wedding looked freaking beautiful and the Kardashians made millions of dollars off of the special so is this really a loss for anyone? Is that heartless to say?

Those Legs Are As Straight As Elton John!

I've found a new little gem on Lifetime and I just can't stop watching! It's like a horrible horrible train wreck! It's called Dance Moms. If you're not watching this show, you don't know what you're missing. The show is about the dancers, moms, and Abby Lee Miller at the Abby Lee Dance Studio in Pittsburg. Some of these dancers are kind of amazing and they're only 9 years old, but the show is more about the moms and their fights with each other and Abby. Abby will do something that gets the moms up in arms and then the drama ensues. Or one of the moms will do something dumb and or say something dumb and all the moms start fighting with each other. Abby is kind of a bitch and all the mom's think their daughter is the best so there's a lot of drama. I'm actively excited to be watching a marathon on TLC. What has happened to my life?!?! Everyone needs to make time on Wednesday night to watch this show.

Manic Monday

Did you know that MTV turned 30 last Monday? I had no idea that it’s been around that long. The network that made all the rock stars and singers famous is now known for ridiculous reality shows like Teen Mom and Jersey Shore. I miss the days when MTV stood for Music Television and there were music videos showing all the time. But I can’t remember the last time I saw a music video playing on MTV. They did away with TRL, which was the last string of hope for music videos. I don’t even know why people make them anymore. The only place to see them now is on YouTube. Obviously, I’m still a big fan of MTV and I watch quite a few of their brain mushing shows, but I feel like they should pull a Nickelodeon and show their old stuff starting at 9pm or something. Reruns of TRL or Making the Video. I would watch that. You do have to give it to MTV though, they’re definitely good at keeping the teen audiences, and sometimes the adult audiences, glued to their TV’s. True Life, Teen Wolf, Awkward, The Challenge, Real World. Those are all entertaining shows. I have a feeling MTV isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Happy belated birthday MTV!

Another One Bites the Dust

VS.

So the most recent Bachelor and the girl he chose on the show are already broken up and the new Bachelorette season just started and I have absolutely non desire to watch it. I mean, why watch a show where you know they’re just going to break up in a day? I watched a few seasons and it held my attention pretty well. I had hope for every couple and then to see that they all break up anyway sucks. Why is the show even on anymore? The break ups have definitely tainted the show for me. Sure it’s cool to see them go to these exotic places, but in the end, it’s all fake. Makes me kind of sad. There are only 2 couples who actually got married. One couple said there were a lot of rough patches before they got married and the other couple didn’t even end up together on the show. The Bachelor picked someone else and then realized he made a mistake. I’d rather go on match.com to find someone. I guess reality TV really is all about the fame.

The Voice

I hope you’re watching The Voice. It’s kind of a good show. I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel about it at first. I was scared it was going to be similar to American Idol, but it’s not at all and I totally appreciate that. There are no bad singers on this show. All the bad singers are gotten rid of before the cameras even started rolling. I really like that because I feel so bad for those people on American Idol. They treat them so horribly. The concept of this show is kind of cool. Various singers come out and the judges have their backs turned. This is all based on voice and not looks at all. If the judge likes what they hear, they push a button that turns their chair to face the singer. The singer then has an opportunity to be on that judges “team” to move on in the competition. Sometimes there is more than one judge to turn around and the singer gets to choose which judge they want to work with. If no judge turns, the singer is out. So that’s round one. Round two are the judges working with the singers on their team to make them all awesome. They all sing the same song and the judge has to eliminate the ones they don’t like after that one song. Eventually, it gets down to a few singers leaving America to vote for the one they like best. The winner becomes “The Voice.” It’s a very interesting concept.

The judges are a really cool group: Christina Aguilera, Cee Lo Green, Blake Shelton, and Adam Levine. I like that these people are singers themselves so they know how the business works and what people are looking for. American Idol had 2 producers and Paula Abdul. Such a horrible combination. I think only singers can appreciate other singers. I never understood how you could judge a singer when you can’t sing yourself. Either way, this show has an awesome concept and it’s one of the few reality shows I hope sticks around. Check it out when you get a chance. It’s on Hulu if you missed it on TV.

Manic Monday

I hope everyone had an awesome zombie Jesus weekend. I dipped my foot in both the Passover celebration and the Easter celebration. It was definitely a good time and I will never eat again. I definitely have a food baby going on right now. But here we are again enjoying, or not, another Monday morning. And what better way to start this morning than with some awesomeness. This guy on Britain's Got Talent, performed a bunch of nursery rhymes in his best singing voice. Kind of cool, but also kind of silly.

Waste of Time

Let's talk about The Bachelor for like 2 seconds because it doesn't deserve more time than that. I think this is the first season I haven't watched in a long time. Not because the guy left 2 girls at the final rose the last time he was on the show leaving America to find him untrustworthy (tabloid words, not mine), but because he talks slower than molasses and I wanted to gouge my eyes out! This guy was so boring, I'm surprised anyone watched the damn show. I watched the first 30 minutes or so of the first show and then deleted the rest of the season. I just couldn't take it. I guess he picked his girl, but they broke up before the show even aired. And that brings me to this blog. Why the hell is The Bachelor still on the air?!?! The network forks over so much money for what? These people break up anyway. Turns out, there have been 15 seasons with only one marriage that actually lasted and even they were having tough times and needed counseling. No one can fall in love on a set with cameras watching your every move. I mean come on. It's a waste of space in my Hulu queue and it's a waste of money. This network should say "no more Bachelor, we're sending all the money we spend on this show to Japan relief." Just saying.

Plus 8 Again?

I’m not sure what to think about this. First of all, I can’t believe it has been almost 2 years since the huge Jon and Kate Plus 8 disaster. It feels kind of like it was yesterday. Second of all, I’m not sure if this is true love or if this is a publicity stunt, but the couple says they miss each other and Jon is trying to win Kate back. Oy vey. He got a job and everything. Again, not sure how I feel about this. They say they do everything for their kids and if there’s one thing they should do it should be to stay out of the lime light. There still might be hope for those kids. If they want to get back together I’m sure that will be good for their family, but if this is for publicity, they should all burn in hell. Jon has publicly apologized for what he did while Kate plays all innocent. I definitely think that the cameras caused all of this drama. They were both seriously out of control. Now that the cameras have gone away, this might be a good thing. That’s the price of fame I guess.

Gunn to Snooki

Good for you Tim Gunn! Over the weekend, my mom and I were waking through Barnes and Noble and she noticed a book that had the name Snooki on it and she asked me who Snooki was. I told her and she had the most disgusted face. It was priceless. Well, now Tim Gunn is chiming in saying that he will not allow Snooki to be one of the guests on Project Runway. Yes! Get those low lives off my TV! Snooki isn’t even a celebrity and if they had her on that show, I would never watch it again. I can’t believe Snooki even got a book deal because the people who watch her on TV more than likely can’t read. I’m pretty sure Snooki can’t read. Anyway, this news made me happy and I had to share.

Genuine?

I just….I don’t even…. I saw a commercial on Hulu yesterday for a new show called Genuine Ken. I never heard of it before so I clicked on the little ad link so I could see what the hell it was and oh my God. I have no words. Well, I have some, but they might be inappropriate. So, Whitney from The Hills is the host of this show and she is the biggest valley girl ever so that naturally makes the show a little lame. The show is about “the search for the great American boyfriend.” Yup. Mmhmm. I don’t even know what to say. Number one the show is called Genuine Ken so that shows that the Ken doll is considered to be a “great boyfriend,” but if you saw Toy Story he's a little gay. And number two each episode is a challenge to see which boy can perform better. There have already been 4 episodes. The first episode had an entertainment challenge to see who could be the most entertaining. The second was to see who could design better. Then, who could cook better. And then who could serf better. Really? So if the guy can serf he makes a good boyfriend? What about the books he reads or the way he thinks. Will those be episodes as well? One of my friends that I’ve known forever will be the first to tell you that a guy is boyfriend material if he can open a jar. Are we really that shallow?

On some level I’m happy to see a show where men are doing these things and not women for once, but regardless, it’s still super shallow. Part of me is curious and wants to watch the show, but the other part of me can’t even bring myself to watch. Take a look for yourself:

Own the World

Well, Oprah's network has gone live. Is there anything that woman doesn't touch in this world. People jokingly say she owns the world, but I don't think it's a joke anymore. Yes, she's over come a lot in her life and this is all probably well deserved, but damn woman. Share the wealth.

I'm sure none of you live under a rock, but I will talk about the network anyway. It's called OWN (the Oprah Winfrey Newtwork) in case you didn't know where the name came from. Oprah claims she started the network because she wants to help women realize their dreams and make them come true. I'm not sure how she plans to accomplish that through a television network, but it's a good idea. At least she didn't say she started it to create world peace or something. I haven't watched it yet because I didn't even know I got the channel until last week, so I'm not sure what she has to offer. I do know there will be a lot of reality shows on there though.

Oprah makes me want to go out there and play with little children or something good. She's always trying to achieve some sort of greatness.

NonFail Blog Friday

Sorry I'm late. It's raining and I had an errand to run for work that ended up being a bust, but I'm here now and ready to kick off this Friday! TGIF!!!

The Biggest Loser finale was this week. I watched it yesterday, but not before latimes.com ruined who the winner was with a picture of him on their home page. I was sad. I’ve always been a big fan of The Biggest Loser. It’s just so inspiring to watch these people go through these life changing journey’s. Plus, Alison Sweeney isn’t too bad to look at either.

I always feel bad when I watch the show while eating junk food. Jillian and Bob, the heavy hitting trainers, always tell me to get off my ass and work out. I read that Jillian Michaels is leaving after season 11, which starts on January 4. I’m kind of surprised. If she doesn’t have people to yell at, what is she going to do? It’s rumored that she wants to start a family or something. I always thought she was a lesbian, not to say she can't start a family that way. I was just making an observation.

Sometimes I like her and sometimes I don’t, but considering how many people she’s helped lose weight, she’s pretty cool. So who will take her place next to Bob? Will Bob leave soon after her? I watch the show to see the contestants and the trainers. Bob and Jillian are kind of crazy and fun to watch. I hope this doesn't hurt the show. The new season is bringing in 2 new trainers so maybe one of them will take over for Jillian. Those are some big scary shoes to fill. I guess we just have to wait and see. I'm excited!

Manic Monday

Oh Kathy Griffin how I love thee. I know it's pretty much a love hate relationship with her. You either love her or you hate her. Well, I think she's very funny, but I do think that she can do some crazy shit sometimes. I watched her show, but I've never seen her live. I would love to do that one day. Not too long ago, she was doing a show for the marines and their families and she started talking about how fat Bristol Palin got after Dancing with the Stars and she got booed for it. Silly marines. Just because her last name is Palin doesn't mean you have to boo someone who makes a true and very funny statement about her. I guess all those marines are Palin lovers. See for yourself. It's very funny.

Trash!

The Palin's always amaze me and I don't know why. Maybe because they're ridiculous and yet get everything in the world. Maybe because they're really dumb and have found a way to be in your living room twice a week. I'm not sure, but the news I heard this morning made me a little sick to my stomach. KROQ does this thing called "the showbiz beat" and it's basically all the dirty stuff happening in Hollywood. It's probably my favorite part of the morning show. This morning they were talking about how Bristol Palin has received all of these deals after being on Dancing with the Stars. She has a book deal, she has a deal with a clothing line to be a spokes person, and she has a deal to do another reality show. And to top it all off, she's going to be traveling around as some sort of speaker and she will be making millions. Just for speaking. The rest will make her even more money. Sick!!! What the hell did she ever do in her life to make her worthy of this? I haven't done much more than her and I feel I'm more worthy than she is. We're all more worthy than she is! She isn't anyone I want anyone I know to strive to be. She has an insane mother, she had a kid when she was like 12, and she can't dance. Oh and speaking of which, I also heard that the votes for her on Dancing with the Stars were rigged!!! If those votes are rigged, imagine what people are capable with her mom. That's some scary shit.

Her mom is a whole other story. She has to fly a private jet everywhere she goes. No excuses. She needs a bendy straw to brink with, which is kind of old news and any question she's ever asked needs to be screened by her "people." I think I just threw up a little.

Puke!

BARF!!!! Can you believe that 5 million people tuned in to watch the Sarah Palin show on TLC? Why people why?!?! Well, to be fair, if I had known when it was on, I probably would have tuned in just to see her train wreck and I'm hoping that's what other people did because if they watched it for pleasure, she will be the next President. 5 million people. That's a lot. All she did was fish and kill bears I'm sure. It's one of those things where we need to get the numbers for the second episode to judge for sure.

Also, what the hell is wrong with TLC? I used to like that channel until the insane Jon and Kate Plus 8 thing and now they give Sarah Palin a show. I want to know who's in charge of that network and I want to know how these things happen. Not only are there shows like Jon and Kate, but what about The Duggars with their 19 Kids and Counting shenanigans? It makes me sick to see that many children in one family. Is TLC trying to show us how we shouldn't be or will they just do anything for ratings? It scares me! I won't even post a video cause no one will watch it.

Reality Sucks

Oh reality TV, you never cease to surprise me. You always have something stupid going on that makes me wonder how the hell you even made it on the air. I heard about a new reality show yesterday called The Same Name. The premise is that someone with the exact same name as a celebrity will swap places with that celebrity for a day. The celebrity will go to work or where ever for that person and the regular person will be on set or where ever for the celebrity. The celebrity will presumably learn a lot about being less wealthy and the regular person will realize that being famous isn’t all that amazing, or something stupid like that.

I have a friend named Vince Lombardi. If the celebrity Vince Lombardi was still alive, I can't imagine him sitting behind a desk all day and I sure as hell can't imagine my friend out on the football field coaching people. Ugh, my brain. This is horrible and stupid. The show will air on CBS at some point. I guess no one cares about good entertainment anymore. I also kind of wish my name was Oprah or something.

Hollywood Fun

Oy vey. There are 2 new celebrity mishaps I would like to touch upon today although one can’t be controlled like the other one.

First we have Lindsay Lohan. What is her problem?!?! There were drugs found in her system last week and she’s still on probation so that means a warrant was out for her arrest. The judge was super harsh on her, which he should have been and decided that she was going to be in put jail for one month without bail. A bunch of other judges heard this and over ruled this and Lindsay was let out on bail. Not only is she getting special treatment, but this girl has some major issues. I thought everyone said rehab helped her. I think she needs to be put under house arrest or something. If she can’t even stay away from drugs for a month, something else needs to be done other than rehab or jail. I’m so sad for her! She has a horrible family who does nothing to help her and the paparazzi won’t leave her the hell alone. I would take drugs too.

Second, we have Gordon Ramsay. He’s probably one of my favorite celebrity chefs. I don’t know why, but for some reason I can’t get enough of him and his wild and crazy shows. Recently, the media is saying that he’s linked to 2 suicides. One was a chick who was on Hell’s Kitchen a while ago who didn’t win and the other was a guy who was on Kitchen Nightmares. His body was found at the bottom of the Hudson River the other day. Of course, the media says it’s Gordon’s fault, but I disagree. I remember the guy from Kitchen Nightmares and he was having major money issues. So whether Gordon put this guy on his show or not, this guy was bound to do harm to himself all on his own. As for the chick from Hell’s Kitchen, I don’t know what happened there. Yes, Gordon Ramsay gets mean on that show, but if she took everything he said to heart and committed suicide because of him and the show, than she had other issues. I can imagine it sucks to be linked to people committing suicide just because they were on your reality show. It’s not like Gordon forces them to be there. They sign up or call him and ask to be on the show. Gordon’s job is just to tell them the truth about their future. He’s there to help. Maybe I’m just biased.

Anyway, it’s just another day in Hollywood.

TV is Back!

I'm so excited for this week. All of our favorite TV shows come back and we even get some new ones. I've been having mini withdrawals here and there. I watched Bones and Grey's Anatomy from the beginning this summer and those are my main shows so my withdrawals weren't too bad. But I miss Glee and Biggest Loser and Hell's Kitchen. I miss watching Gordon Ramsey yell at people. I miss watching Jillian Michaels make overweight people run up hills. Luckily, the shows Master Chef and Working Out With Jillian Michaels held me over for a bit, but it's still not the same. The Jillian Michaels show was so boring I could barely make it through 2 episodes. Master Chef was awesome though.

There are some new shows that seem kind of interesting. No Ordinary Family has me a tiny bit intrigued, but I can see it getting old real fast. I heard it's about a family who gets magical powers after a plane crash or something. Kind of weird, but kind of interesting. There's another show I keep seeing commercials for called The Event. Apparently, it's supposed to be the next Lost. I never watched Lost so it doesn't really appeal to me, but I guess it's worth a shot right. Lost had a huge fan base and I'm sure they're hoping The Event will as well. My roommate refuses to watch it because there have been so many commercials. Usually, that means something is going to suck. I will have to watch it and let you know.

Happy TV watching!!!

Dancing With Who?

Have you seen the new line-up for Dancing With The Stars? It’s pretty laughable:

Singer, Brandy
Actress, Jennifer Grey
Comedian, Margaret Cho
Audrina Patridge (‘The Hills’)
Actress, performer, and talk show host, Florence Henderson
Bristol Palin (daughter of Sarah Palin)
Singer, Michael Bolton
Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino (‘Jersey Shore’)
Actor, David Hasselhoff
Former NFL player, Kurt Warner
Actor, Kyle Massey
Former NBA player & actor, Rick Fox

Seriously! How ridiculous is this list? Brandy, Jennifer Grey, Kurt Warner, Kyle Massey, Rick Fox, and even David Hasselhoff make sense, but the rest…. The guy who calls himself “The Situation” from the Jersey Shore is going to be on the show? Even freaking Bristol Palin is going to be on the show?!?! You’ve got to be kidding me. I honestly have no words. Sarah Palin’s reputation is diminished more and more every day and the guy from Jersey Shore isn’t a “star” and therefore shouldn’t qualify for this show. Margaret Cho makes me sad. I like her and her major potty mouth. Why would she do a washed up show like this? I kind of want to watch this season just because I want to see how insane it is. I mean who decided to bring these people on the show? I feel like they should be fired or something. I’m semi hoping this list is a joke or a publicity stunt.

TV Never Sounded So Sweet

I'm having major TV show withdrawals. I'm completely caught up on Bones, I miss Glee and 30 Rock, Law and Order: SVU is going to have Jennifer Love Hewitt as a guest when it comes back, Hell's Kitchen just ended, but I miss that as well. I even miss The Biggest Loser. The only thing I have to look forward to right now is Grey's Anatomy, which is holding me over for now, but I need more! I have to wait another 3 weeks before all the shows come back. So in honor of the Emmy's and my tiny little brain needing more rotting, here is a list of my favorite shows and their return dates.

Tues, September 21:
- The Biggest Loser
- Glee
- Parenthood (I'm still not sure how I feel about this show. It might be a little too drama filled for me, but I know two of the people on the show and feel semi obligated to continue watching. I even saw Monica Potter at the Hallmark in the Fashion Square. She had no make-up on and was wearing all white. She looked like a ghost.)

Wednesday, September 22:
- Hell's Kitchen
- Modern Family (This past season was the first time I ever watched this show and it's freaking hilarious. If you haven't seen it, you're missing out!)
- Law and Order: SVU (I finally finished last season of this show with my mom and I already want it to come back. It's time when my mom and I bond.)

Thursday, September 23:
- 30 Rock
- Bones
- Grey's Anatomy
- The Office
- CSI

Thursday is the most insane. It has every show that I like watching and the TiVo only records 2 shows at a time. I guess that's why God invented Hulu. Is it September 21 yet?