Jewel Me

I learned something new the other night and I’m very surprised I never heard of it before. Boys, here’s where things get a little crazy so you can choose to keep reading or not, but don’t blame me for anything. I learned about this new activity some girls like called vajazzling. It’s pretty much exactly what you’re all thinking. You put jewels of your vag. I can only imagine that this would be the most uncomfortable thing ever. As a girl with a vagina, the thought of some jewels on me makes me uncomfortable. Imagine the chaffing. It can’t be comfortable during intimacy for either party, right? Anyway, I was saddened to find out that this new fad became popular because of my fav, Jennifer Love Hewitt. Seriously, type vajazzling into Google and her name is the first thing that pops up. She talked about it on the George Lopez show and how one of her friends wanted to cheer her up after a break up by vajazzling her “special lady.” Barf, who says that? I may need to rethink who my favorite celebrity is after this. Apparently, Jen Love wrote a book, which I didn’t know about either called The Day I Shot Cupid and she dedicated an entire chapter to her vajazzling after her break up. Seriously disturbed right now and so intrigued all at the same time. I really need to find this book and read that chapter.

Anyway, bottom line is why would anyone want to super glue some jewels to their secret places? Guys, if you’re still reading, would you balldazzle? Imagine having sex with a girl for the first time and you drop trow and she’s blinded by your disco balls. Do you dance under them or what? Sorry, maybe I’m going a little over board, but this seems a little ridiculous to me. So Jennifer Love Hewitt, with all do respect, some things are better left unsaid….